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Sunday, October 07, 2007

The Thief that I am


I
shamelessly stole this.

If I were going to steal a meme from Lime & SnowElf... it would be this one.

If I were a beginning, I would be... zero, zilch, nada, nothing, zip, = N - N, null, undefined, void.

If I were a month, I would be... March, because that was the month I received the blessing of fatherhood.

If I were a time of day, I would be... 12:00AM, because there's no way to tell if that's noon or midnight.

If I were a planet, I would be... Uranus, because I'm told at times I'm an ass.

If I were a season, I would be... The Holiday Season, because there's time made for friends, Eggnog with nutmeg, gifts, appreciation, smiles, hugs, meeting forgotten friends, family, food and all the things we work hard for during the year.

If I were a sea animal, I would be... So depressed, because then I'd only have seafood to eat (I hate seafood.)

If I were a direction, I would be... Straight Up, because I'm that way as much as I can possibly be anyway.

If I were a piece of furniture, I would be... An Armoire, they hold a lot, thus hide a lot, and they aren't bad looking.

If I were a sin, I would be... Sloth, because I'm lazy that way.

If I were a liquid, I would be... conforming, because that's what liquids do.

If I were a scare, I would be... the late cycle, because that scares everybody and its such a relief to learn it was only a scare.

If I were a gem, I would be... flawed.

If I were a flower/plant, I would be... Oleander, ornamental but deadly.

If I were a kind of weather, I would be... Florida weather, lots of sun and rain, ever changing.

If I were a musical instrument, I would be... a Theremin, as modern as electronics, dated, hard to get good music from, creepy at times, but infinitely cool to play with.

If I were an animal, I would be... human, there's nothing more deadly in the animal kingdom, but hardly anything else can be as altruistic.

If I were an emotion, I would be... apathy, because I don't care as much about emotions as most.

If I were a vegetable, I would be... less lucky than I was on a motorcycle.

If I were a sound, I would be... a whisper, I hate loud voices, and some whispers can be sweet.

If I were an element, I would be... carbon, all life is based upon it, and its pure cubic form is the hardest substance known, and valuable as well.

If I were a car, I would be... a Pagani Zonda.

If I were a song, I would be... "I want to know what love is" by Foreigner.

If I were a food, I would be... Beef, its what's for dinner, and nobody would ask "Where's the beef?"

If I were a place, I would be... Utopia, since nobody has managed to find it.

If I were a material, I would be... Teflon, nothing sticks to it and it can take the heat, its a great insulator and its a high dollar plastic.

If I were a taste, I would be... Sweet.

If I were a scent, I would be... The smell of the first pot of coffee in the morning.

If I were a religion, I would be... fair, rational, undemanding, unpretentious, available to all, exclusive of none, intolerant of intolerance. I wouldn't exist.

If I were a sentence, I would be... succinct and informative.

If I were a facial expression, I would be... an indistinguishable smirk with a gleam in the eye.

If I were a subject in school, I would be... Science. Other than math, there's nothing so clearcut.

If I were a colour, I would be... infrared, just barely visible, low frequency, and warm.

If I were a thing, I would be... a hand? (snap, snap(think Adam's family))

If I were a book, I would be... informative, easy to read, imaginative, thought provoking. Wait... I may be a book.

If I were an artist, I would be... me.

If I were a collection of poems, I would be... left alone around here.

If I were a landmass, I would be... the Florida peninsula, out there, but connected, lush, but tamable.

If I were a watch, I would be... the morning watch, because most are asleep then.

If I were God, I would be... infuriated, that there is so much evil done in my name.

If I were a vowel, I would be... I, (that's who I am.)

If I were a consonant, I would be... s, the most common consonant in the English language, so I'd be easy to miss.

If I were a theory, I would be... String theory, hard to understand, out there, and not here nor there.

If I were a famous person, I would be... miserable.

If I were an item of electronic equipment, I would be... A high-end Oscilloscope.

If I were a sport, I would be... F1 racing.

If I were a movie, I would be... Casablanca, Richard Blaine is a man I can relate to, and Ingrid Bergman was such a beauty.

If I were a cartoon, I would be... Buggs Bunny.

If I were an explorer, I would be... a seeker of truth.

If I were a scientist, I would be... doing Artificial Intelligence.

If I were a relation, I would be... a daddy to my daughter.

If I were a river, I would be... the Mississippi, calm and important.

If I were intoxication, I would be... fun while there, missed when I wasn't.

If I were alone, I would be... happier than ever.

If I were a question, I would be... What if...?

If I were a habit, I would be... annoying.

If I were in an atom, I would be... teetering on the edge of quantum and Newtonian.

If I were you, I would be... different than I am. Way different. Probably more centered.

For the ease of those who may want to steal this also, click the "Read Full Post." link to copy this without having to strip all the answers.


If I were going to steal a meme from ... it would be this one.

If I were a beginning, I would be...

If I were a month, I would be...

If I were a time of day, I would be...

If I were a planet, I would be...

If I were a season, I would be...

If I were a sea animal, I would be...

If I were a direction, I would be...

If I were a piece of furniture, I would be...

If I were a sin, I would be...

If I were a liquid, I would be...

If I were a scare, I would be...

If I were a gem, I would be...

If I were a flower/plant, I would be...

If I were a kind of weather, I would be...

If I were a musical instrument, I would be...

If I were an animal, I would be...

If I were an emotion, I would be...

If I were a vegetable, I would be...

If I were a sound, I would be...

If I were an element, I would be...

If I were a car, I would be...

If I were a song, I would be...

If I were a food, I would be...

If I were a place, I would be...

If I were a material, I would be...

If I were a taste, I would be...

If I were a scent, I would be...

If I were a religion, I would be...

If I were a sentence, I would be...

If I were a facial expression, I would be...

If I were a subject in school, I would be...

If I were a colour, I would be...

If I were a thing, I would be...

If I were a book, I would be...

If I were an artist, I would be...

If I were a collection of poems, I would be...

If I were a landmass, I would be...

If I were a watch, I would be...

If I were God, I would be...

If I were a vowel, I would be...

If I were a consonant, I would be...

If I were a theory, I would be...

If I were a famous person, I would be...

If I were an item of electronic equipment, I would be...

If I were a sport, I would be...

If I were a movie, I would be...

If I were a cartoon, I would be...

If I were an explorer, I would be...

If I were a scientist, I would be...

If I were a relation, I would be...

If I were a river, I would be...

If I were intoxication, I would be...

If I were alone, I would be...

If I were a question, I would be...

If I were a habit, I would be...

If I were in an atom, I would be...

If I were you, I would be...

Labels:

20 Comments:

At Sunday, October 7, 2007 at 8:33:00 PM EDT, Blogger snowelf $visitorIP said...

Hi Charles :)

Wasn't this a good one!

I'm not a seafood fan either.

You are totally straight up.

I have to look up the musical instrument--I have NO idea what that is.

Whispers are very sweet. Which of course totally conflicts with you being an ass. ;)

You might actually be a book.

Nice choice for God.

I KNEW you'd pick string theory. ;)

Hey! I actually know what an oscilloscope is! :D

You know Casablanca is my favorite!!

You would TOTALLY be Bugs Bunny!

Great answers Charles! :)

--snow

At Sunday, October 7, 2007 at 8:41:00 PM EDT, Blogger lime $visitorIP said...

if you were a sea animal there would still be plankton and kelp....just a thought...

fun read, thanks, hehehehe

At Sunday, October 7, 2007 at 9:55:00 PM EDT, Blogger MONA $visitorIP said...

If I were the beginning I would be the word...

If I were a mononth, I would be just 31 days old at the most!

Time of the day..I would be a minute!

lol! @ planet!

Season? I would be all seasons...

Sea animal.. don't worry baba, We will feed you worms on hooks if you want earth food!

Direction? I would be one unto myself...

Charles is so afraid he wants to be armor! nyah!

Sin? Oh aren't we all sin full [ pun intended]

Liar.. I can never see you taking the shape of the thing you are put in.. you'd be so stubborn!

Late cycle was never a scare with me! [ laughs ironically]

If it is flawed, it is no longer a gem. It is HUMAN!

Flower? ... aren't we all plastic flowers...permanently ornamental but fake in some senses.

Theremin does not sound like a musical ornament. It is more a cacophony I see from your description of course. No harmony there! Harmony is the only way you define music. Ps> I would be a sitar...

Agreed about the animal bit
@ emotions.. You should be ASHAMED about that, not proud. & by the way, you lie. I don't see you like that with your daughter! SNEER!

Vegetable.. but aren't we all already those...We cease to be after the age of twelve. We only rely of fed out factual knowledge. We Vegetate. We are all cabbages.Some are bad some are the best cabbages in the world.. but cabbages...

I thought you were going to say Careless Whispers...

Carbon.. Ditto I would be that too!

I wouldn't want to be a car. I don't like ppl sitting their asses on me!

See? I told you? you cannot be apathy .. because howsoever you might deny to yourself you still WANT to know what love is!

Thank God you didn't say chicken!!... or beefcake....

Utopia.. hmm.. reiteration of the fact that he wants to hide himself...what are you afraid of?

Good idea about the material... although I doubt it would itself stick long enough to whatever..

Sweet? this seems so incongruous with the rest! I bet you wanted to say sugar coated pill!

Smell! I am about to faint just thinking of that!...

I would be neither religion nor irreligion...I would not conform to any of those that already exist.

If I were a sentence I would be a loaded one..

maniacal you mean. I don't think so. If anyone is an expression it is always 'changing'

Subject wise... Cool!

I would NEVER be infrared. I find that spooky. I would be.. am grey..

& I would be the heart...there is nothing without the center itself

If i were a book, I would be intriguing and captivating & hard to keep away!

Ditto about Artist!

Collection of poems...hmmmm....

If I were a landmass I would be Italy.. I would LOVE to give the boot to so many...

If I were a watch.. I would be BAYWATCH! :D

God & infuriated? does not match! You would be just deluding yourself that you were one if you could feel that as God!

Vowel.. None... Together they sound like EEEWWWWWW

There he goes hiding behind a s again hehe!

I wouldn't be theory. I would be existential !

Misery doesn't exist with fame. it is with the need for more & more.

Electronic item. Duh huh! But I already am. I HAVE electrons!

as a sport.... Oh I AM a sport they say ! :) Ahem!

As a movie I would be A Beautiful Mind... very inspiring...

Scientist...If I were one, I would be a specimen unto myself!

Relation? I do not like being a noun That is like being dead. I would be 'Relating' rather. A verb...

If I were a river, I would be fresh & unpolluted & flowing

I do not like to even think of being intoxication. I'd rather be Awareness!

If I were alone, i would be complete.

If I were a question, I would also be the answer in itself!

Habit? If I were one, it would be 'oral hygiene'

Atom? I am not one I am MANY!

If I were you...I wouldn't be a thief...See I almost did this too & without stealing...

At Sunday, October 7, 2007 at 10:48:00 PM EDT, Blogger Charles $visitorIP said...

Hi Snow,

Yes, it really was one of the better ones I've seen. I was tempted when I saw Lime do it, but I'm not great at following a better comedian than I am.

You have to look up Theremin? Jerry Lewis did a piece in one of his movies that was pretty funny with one of them. Conflicts in my answers are to be expected, I'm enigmatic.

Wow, you are a geeky girl, not a whole lot of girls would remember what an oscilloscope is (I like that), mainly because they wouldn't care.
Casablanca is probably the only thing I have on both VHS and DVD.

At Sunday, October 7, 2007 at 10:51:00 PM EDT, Blogger Charles $visitorIP said...

Lime,
Plankton and kelp are still from the sea, I remember trying a piece of kelp once, the fishiness gagged me.

This was a fun meme, and I'm not into memes much. Thanks for exposing us.

At Sunday, October 7, 2007 at 10:56:00 PM EDT, Blogger Charles $visitorIP said...

Mona,
Oh my GAWD! You could have just taken the questions, and had an entire post. Ok, you pointed out my misspelling of "Armoire", thanks for that, its corrected now. I'll talk to you later.

At Monday, October 8, 2007 at 10:16:00 AM EDT, Blogger lime $visitorIP said...

ok, fair enough. i personally hate invetebrates except for crab. regular fish is good though. i thought maybe if i found something plant based for you...

At Monday, October 8, 2007 at 4:55:00 PM EDT, Blogger jillie $visitorIP said...

That is such a great me-me! In fact, I think that is probably the best one that I have ever read. I only wish I could eat (some) seafood. I am deathly allergic to shellfish which is about the only seafood I like....boooohooo!!

I so hear you on the famous part. They couldn't pay me ENOUGH. I like my being able to walk down the street and not have anyone know who I am ;o)

You have some very creative answers.

As for your comment on the party...it is work but oh soooo worth it.

At Monday, October 8, 2007 at 7:35:00 PM EDT, Blogger Charles $visitorIP said...

Jillie,
Thank Lime and SnowElf for stealing it before me. :) I'm not allergic unless you consider nauseated a symptom. Yeah, I like my anonymity and heaven forbid I become one of the targets of paparazzi, I'd be mooning them. I don't envy your task ahead of you, preparing for a huge party.

At Tuesday, October 9, 2007 at 2:38:00 PM EDT, Blogger Top cat $visitorIP said...

Very cool answers charles.
I think I might give this one a try down the road.
Bob Moog of Moog fame has recreated a much smaller scale Theremin which can be had I believe for around 4 or 5 hundred smackeroos.
They are manufactured by Big Briar.
:)
tc

At Tuesday, October 9, 2007 at 5:05:00 PM EDT, Blogger Charles $visitorIP said...

TC,
Thanks, as I said, if you click the link, the bare questions are at the bottom of the post. I was aware of the Moog, in fact there is a guy on YouTube by the name of Thomas Grillo, who gives four lessons on playing one, the guy makes the thing sing like a woman's voice and some points it sounds more like a violin.
YouTube - VOCALISE ON THEREMIN AND PIANO
Its really quite beautiful. I used to have a magazine back in the day (the 70s) that had a schematic if I remember correctly, for a tube version, and there are many sites on the web detailing construction. I'm thinking it might be a fun project with transistors, winding all the coils myself, but the variable capacitors aren't as available as they used to be, and the good ones aren't cheap. Maybe I should make my own of those, too. A great advantage to making them yourself is that you can make them any capacity you want. The idea behind one is really quite simple a couple of oscillators one being a Colpitts with an antenna to change the capacity of the tuned circuit, that are heterodyned together, for the pitch and another to the volume. I'll look into it and one day I'll probably do it.

At Tuesday, October 9, 2007 at 5:06:00 PM EDT, Blogger Little Wing $visitorIP said...

Very good answers Charles.
I was interested in your admission that you don't care about emotions as much as others.
I sometimes wish I could be less emotional.

At Tuesday, October 9, 2007 at 8:02:00 PM EDT, Blogger Charles $visitorIP said...

Little Wing,
I used to feel very strongly on a lot of things, but they bit me in the butt so many times I've learned not to care so much about them. I still have strong feelings about a few things.

At Saturday, October 13, 2007 at 12:14:00 PM EDT, Blogger no.good.at.coding $visitorIP said...

Hey Charles,

Loved your answers, you must have really put some thought into these, huh? Touching, funny and thought-provoking.

And I find I have a lot in common with you! Especially about the seafood :)

At Saturday, October 13, 2007 at 12:17:00 PM EDT, Blogger no.good.at.coding $visitorIP said...

P.S. Think the new header image looks great!

At Saturday, October 13, 2007 at 3:15:00 PM EDT, Blogger Charles $visitorIP said...

NGAC,
On the contrary, most of them are answered off the cuff. Thanks for the complement although I didn't actually create it, Courtland took the picture, cropped it and did the fade. All I did was pose with a flash going off in my eyes, and insert it into my template.

At Sunday, October 14, 2007 at 10:45:00 AM EDT, Blogger MONA $visitorIP said...

That song by Foreigner...I have come back to it many a times too...It has been one of my faves since I have forgotten when...

At Sunday, October 14, 2007 at 4:24:00 PM EDT, Blogger Charles $visitorIP said...

Mona,
Its always been one of those songs that was just so musical, you had to like it, even if it might be something one would listen to when in love, just broken up, or whatever.

At Friday, October 19, 2007 at 4:21:00 AM EDT, Blogger Mike M $visitorIP said...

I liked your answer. I am about to post this meme myself...which I took for you....or snow.....or lime....somebody....I forgot

At Friday, October 19, 2007 at 6:00:00 PM EDT, Blogger Charles $visitorIP said...

Cool Beans Mike,
I don't know exactly who or where it originates, but whoever did it, did a really good one. I don't normally like memes, but this one so well done, I took it upon myself. Lime probably knows since I saw it on her blog first. I'm sure you'll do a good job on it.

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